They told me it was a workshop. At 4AM, five men tried to beat me.

And no! This wasn’t some “masculine energy” bonding exercise.
It was a full-blown test of my deepest fear:

• conflict with other men.

Here's how it started:
I was on stage.
The trainer said nothing. Just left me there.
Seconds later, five men from his team charged toward me:

• aggressive,
• silent,
• eyes locked.
  They were sent to break me.

But I didn’t freeze.
I fought back.
Every cell in my body said: not again.

And then... the command:
The trainer ordered them all to kneel in front of me.
It was a setup.
A constellation designed to bring my greatest emotional trauma to the surface—and rip it apart.

This all happened at 4 in the morning.

Five minutes.
That’s all it took.
Five minutes to relive 25 years of emotional suppression.

My body going into full survival mode.

Fists clenched.
Adrenaline surging.
No plan. Just raw instinct. In a safe environment.
Fight or be crushed. Again.

Now, let me be clear:
This wasn’t a stunt. This was healing by fire.

Here’s the real insight:
If you don’t face your emotional shadows, your nervous system stays hijacked forever.

And let’s be honest: most of you avoid confrontation not because you’re peaceful, but because you’re terrified.

I know that fear.
At 14 and again at 17, I was violently beaten by other boys.
Not once. Repeatedly.
Your body remembers that.
Your system learns to stay small.
Quiet.
Agreeable.
Safe.

Until you say enough.

Here’s what helped me break that fear loop:
This class was five days, in a huge hall, deep emotional work... while most of my colleagues were sunbathing on Greek islands or drinking cocktails under palm trees.

I chose something else.

I chose to stop hiding.

1. I stepped into discomfort voluntarily.
   No, not by writing about emotions in a journal. I entered the fire. Literally.
   If you want to get past fear, you can’t out-think it. You have to meet it in the body.
2. I stopped spiritualizing emotional pain.
   Not everything needs to be "healed" with light and love.
   Sometimes it needs to be confronted, with grounded, real intensity.
3. I understood how my emotional system actually works.
   Let me drop one expert card:
   In Human Design, this is connected to the Solar Plexus center.
   When you avoid emotional truth, you operate from what's called the Not-Self aka the Shadow.
   You become a pleaser.
   A fake calm.
   A professional avoider of your own feelings.

Sound familiar?

I'm in the world of coaching for 31 years.
I've seen hundreds of emotional breakthroughs.
This work?
It isn’t always pretty.
But it’s real.
And it frees you.

You scared of conflict? Or just scared of your own power?

P.S.:
⁉️ Ever been pushed that far in a training or therapy space? DM me.
♻️ Share to help evolve how we stop faking our lives.