“I’ve made so many mistakes by talking too much.”

“I’ve made so many mistakes by talking too much.” That’s what I told my wife recently. And it’s true.

I’ve forced conversations, tried to sound clever, chased recognition with words. Too often, I was speaking from the mind—not from presence.

That’s why what I noticed Saturday night hit me so deeply.

A birthday party on Lake Zurich. A beautiful evening, good food, good wine, groups gathered in circles, switching languages. I moved between them, eager to connect.

But everywhere I went, I heard almost the same theme: frustration.

Men in their thirties arguing about taxes. About who works too much, who embraced recently the best strategies, who doesn’t work enough, why some gets carried by the Swiss system. Another debate about Zurich spending 38 million francs on a bicycle tunnel. Car vs. bicycle.
Voices sharpened, men battling for the "microphone"—desperate to be the one holding it.

And then—another energy entirely. The women. Mostly between thirty and forty. Grounded. Mature. Waiting. Not trying to prove, just present. Smiling, connecting, carrying the evening with calm.

By the end of the night, standing in a circle with my wife and other beautiful women, I felt it clearly:

Frustration and bitterness aren’t failures. They’re signals.

My concept Human Design Psychology, teaches that the mind will always talk about things that don’t matter. Money spent by the government. Hierarchies. Administrative tasks most of us can’t control. The Mind (aka Head & Ajna) are built to ask questions and spin stories, but they are never the authority. Instead I'm following my own Strategy & Authority, and I don't get easy pulled into distractions: politics, arguments, proving, endless “head center” talk.

When we let the mind make decisions, we push into things the body cannot sustain. Like a string of contradictory talks, one subject after another.
For those of us who are designed to trust our gut response, that collapse feels like frustration. For others, it shows up as bitterness—or anger—or disappointment.

It’s not wrong. It’s information.

But when we wait—when we let the wave of emotion settle and then listen to the body—we enter a different rhythm. Presence replaces performance. Connection replaces argument.

I’ve ignored those signals before and ended up exhausted, embarrassed, or committed to things I never truly wanted.... like the time I imported a shipment of merchandise for €15,000 because I swore the business would take off. Months later those boxes were collecting dust in my cellar. The excitement faded, clarity never showed up, and I was left with receipts, regret, and no sales.

But when I honor the signals, I stop fighting for the microphone, I stop fighting to just speak.
And I start carrying presence.

That’s where I want to live.

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Every “yes” has a cost $$$. Without clarity, you pay in frustration.
Follow me on LinkedIn and here for insights, if you’re tired of frustration and want to learn how to actually wait for clarity.